Leaving Cannes critics perplexed and polarized this spring, Ari Aster's Eddington takes aim at the fabric of the American zeitgeist. Is it the defining finger on the pulse of COVID-abetted brain rot? Or is it as groan-worthy as an "Ari Aster COVID movie" sounds? We discuss the film, Aster's filmography, and the prospect of assembling a political perspective through a fractured, dogshit Internet.